Between the Lines

I’ve been having a wayward, yet enjoyable argument with my brother, of late, concerning the viewpoint of Don Quixote. I have read (most) of the book, while he looked up someone’s opinion on Wikipedia and regurgitated it as some kind of informed discussion. You obviously know where I put my jelly beans. Yes. In my own opinion.

That being said, he believes the Don is all about running away from his problems, making something larger than what it is to make it seem much more important, and being incredibly depressed to his lot in life when he’s in some of his more lucid states.

I believe the Don never runs away from his problems (albeit, he runs from what society wants him to be: heavy-handed, rich, proper, with his head out of the clouds), slowly and steadily gains a following of people who begin to understand his dream, and sees an overall boring, backward society (and world) as an incredible, powerful place to live.

I’m bringing this to light because I believe both sides are justifiable, arguable ones. Has anyone else read Don Quixote? I’m inclined to believe those who see society as a helpful, nurturing thing will tend to believe Don Quixote as delusional and in denial, while those who see society as a status quo and statistics will tend to believe Quixote is recreating the world in a much more meaningful way.

Now, my brother says that everything the Don sees is fantastical and delusional, and this frustrates me because he clearly didn’t read the book; the Don rarely turned something into a fantastical thing, and tended to refer more to the person’s personality more than the person’s ability. People who are there to run him out of his unpaid-for bed tend to be brigands, and women of impeccable look tend to be princesses.

To the contrary, he fought for his lady for a long while, even though he had never met her, and had no idea what she looked like. When they finally met, he found her the most beautiful thing in the world, even though she was worn by years of working in the field, wore rags, and was overall a negative thing to look at. He saw the inner beauty–not the fantastical, let’s-be-royalty-for-the-day beauty.

He would often do things like attack the captors of abused criminals in chains, usually being beaten to within an inch of his life. His actions would usually come back to haunt him, with the criminals returning to rob him blind at a later date. Did he run from his problems? No. Did he create many problems? Yes.

Quixote was a revolutionary without a revolution. He fought for a more organized society that disregarded caste and wealth, and he saw all people through the same lens. Furthermore, he slowly gained followers not because he turned everything into a fantasy, but because he began convincing them he saw a better life–and that Dulcinea would reward them. He had become the purveyor of fine romance, of masculine strength and humilty, a bard and a storyteller, all the while walking a road only he could see.

I do not believe he ever was in denial, in spite of what many of the characters–and the writer of that Wiki–said. I believe he cut through the outer shell, the physical. He was rarely safe, spoke out of turn often, and was confused quite often as well. He was usually enraged by his society’s lack of understanding, and their disbelief, and sometimes grew depressed and saddened by how simple everyone around him lived.

But this is my argument. I can’t speak on Brian’s behalf because I’m certain he’d pick my word choice apart, and create an anthill out of a mountain (read: I might put words in his mouth), so I won’t write of it.

I’m fairly certain most of you have never even picked up the complicated, convoluted book, much less read more than two chapters. And I understand that. Regardless, I’d like your opinions. ~x

Always serves to inspire me.

The fantasy bug is, I think, once more making a comeback to the mainstream. With the serialization of Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings trilogy, the marketing of the Harry Potter series, and even the (unwarranted) success of Paolini’s Eragon, American culture is beginning to embrace the power of the fantastic.

The latest fantastic explosion is of course Avatar, and its 3D syrup-covered pancake success. Most everyone that has seen it said the reason for seeing it was the 3D of it, and even the most avid fantasy reader has understood the storyline was crap. It’s not for movies to make good storylines, though. Movies are for visuals. Just like food is primarily for taste–you can make it look as nice as ever, but one bite sells or fails it. Books are primarily for characterization and plot. Movies are for scenery and extravagance, external characterization if warranted. I’m not talking about works of literary merit, or movies of literary merit, or foods of… literary merit. I’m talking about the pop culture need-as-it-may sensationalism.

Nuances are too nuanced. Anyway. I digress.

I’m incredibly inspired by the use of the universe as a staging ground for a resurgence of interest. As ever, fantasy is growing into a beautiful and incredibly developed niche – much as Noir and romance had its place, its turn, now so does fantasy.

I’m loving what I’m seeing.

Wrote around fifteen pages in P1 today. I’ll probably write around five more before I find my way to sleep. Finally, this story has the second layer being added: the real. Although it isn’t finished with its first layer, the second layer is coming along quite nicely. The two “cults,” one religious and one corporate (not at all different from each other) are finally in place, with champions from both. Okembe is finally doing something behind the scenes. I don’t know why it was impossible for me to write these aspects in the first place. I believe it’s because I was too anchored in the ethereal and metaphysical to be able to write of the real. The moment I began writing of it, it turned into something meta.

I have my lack of internet connection to thank for my recent writing splurge (currently running on “wireless broadband USB plugin power”). Landlord promises a phone jack by Monday noon. Which is cool. He also took a bit off my rent as recompense.

If Cygnus gets the job she has an interview for, we will finally both have weekends off. And an opportunity to go to Six Flags. And see family in StL. And perhaps even go camping.

My client for P2 hasn’t been in communication with me much; it’s been about a month since we talked about the project. I’ve been working on it, off and on, in the meantime, constantly laying out the groundwork for everything. But I do need direction. I hope he gets back with me soon. He had been hospitalized with a viral sickness of some kind, and was given military leave to the US for a few weeks.

Went to Taste of Champaign last weekend with coworker Whitney and her son Malcolm. He’s an incredibly intelligent boy. The Taste was pretty much a drag, given the humidity and the fact I didn’t bring any actual cash to the event. Vendors can’t make change with a credit card. Heh. It went well, although Whitney seemed awkward. She likes Bethany, and I hope she doesn’t get fired. It seems she’s got some serious challenges going on in her life. Eh. It’s nice to have friends around here; LIKE PAUL! hahaha Hopefully he still reads this.

Well. I’m back to writing. I might dedicate this book to Don Quixote. It seems fitting. “To Don Quixote, for his dream was a possible one.” hahaha

Oi.

Home sick.

NOT Homesick.

The past few days have been miserable for me. I’m not sure what brought it about, but I have a pretty solid feeling it was the leftover taco pizza I brought back from my parents. It was left out all night and morning at their house, in the garage, when it got 79 degrees outside. I brought it home, a 3 hour drive, and then put it in the fridge. I then took it to work with the intention of eating it, but it was too messy to do while driving so I didn’t. Left it out for another four or five hours. Then came home, heated it up in the oven, and ate it. Hilarity ensued. It wasn’t even all that awesome. Now, Chicken Alfredo pizza with French sauce is incredible (Hence the Uppercase)… but yeah. I was an idiot.

Now my throat is swelling up, I can barely swallow, and I cough up… nothing. Which means I’m having an allergy attack. RUN.

I haven’t written anything readable for a bit; I’ve been working on hanging out (Springtime makes me inspired like a crazyboy, but I’m always inspired around 10:30, where I’m driving like an idiot. Now, of course, I’m sick, so no inspiration here). As usual, I want to be published. I want to have my book out for all to see. I want to finish proofing AK again, finish P1, and get some kind of proofing finished on Mindgames, which will be incorporated into the Worldtree universe. Oi. And the gunslinger side-story. And the brothers zombie side-story.

Anyways, I’m frustrated at something. Perpetually, really, but I’ll find out what it is, exactly, and push through it. Perhaps it’s complacency. I’m at a place in my professional career that I’m happy with my job(s), and I’m going to be able to make a lot of headway with savings and the like. It’s just… yeah. Something.

Probably just the fact I haven’t written chapters in months. I wish I weren’t sick. I’ll try and write on Saturday while Cygnus is at work.

We’re talking about getting tattoos. Hahaha. Two shark’s teeth.

And. Just bought fuzzy seatcovers for Hobbes. Real FUR! hahaha

Sometimes I wonder if there’s even a pattern beneath the pattern when it comes to how people act and react. This is a vague sentence, I know. Mostly because the moment I started typing it whizzed right out of my head. Whatever I was going to say.

The more I want to write on my books, the more I don’t. I believe I’m starting to get writer’s block. I want to write all the time, while I’m at work, but the moment I get home my head goes empty. It’s so incredibly frustrating I can barely contain myself. Anyway…

(Politics rant incoming)

I’m reading random crap on Facebook about punching Pelosi in the face. I assume this has to do with you being a republican and not wanting to get our taxes lowered. I’ve watched the politicals. I’ve heard the arguments. I’ve read the propaganda. Now, all I’m looking for is someone to actually explain why the healthcare reform is bad. Or unconstitutional. Or unAmerican. While I understand the GOP rides on fear and Who Is This Other, I can’t help but BEG someone to explain to me why this is bad. I hear vague rhetoric about something Socialist and something Unconstitutional, and leave it at that. I’ve even heard some Murcan go, “It’s Socialist. You aren’t a Socialist, are you?” to which I replied, “What’s a Socialist?” “Damn N***** that steals our money and gives it to someone in his family.” Yes, this is an extreme example. But at least he gave what he thought was a well-educated answer. It’s more than I can say for my GOP friends.

And since being Socialist is basically being a Terrorist (same with Marxism, and Naziism, and being Muslim, and Middle Eastern… oh. A pattern. To be a Terrorist is to be the “Other.” Fear.), it’s no surprise every fundie and rightwing brainwasher (all extremes in themselves) are having a holocaust with this idea. (Holocaust means an offering to God, in case anyone ever wondered what that word came from) Yet, it’s not just the extremes that want to “Punch Pelosi in the face.” It’s the majority of the GOP. From what I’ve read, it makes a lot of sense to have this kind of healthcare system… Considering when we compare our system to most second-world countries, our is worse than theirs, I’m quite surprised over how upset everyone is getting.

Which leads perhaps to an explanation of my pattern within the pattern thought. If the GOP is throwing around “YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF THIS PRESIDENT!” while backing a man that easily wasted fifty times the money Obama has, perhaps they themselves are afraid of change. I mean, that’s pretty obvious. Change is bad for the GOP. Change means standing up proudly and saying there’s something that needs fixing. Yet.

It’s just strange how this whole system works. I mean, everyone at the top is corrupt. You have to be to get the backing to get there. It’s mostly high school homecoming court, from a whole societal structure, and not trying to find the best man to run the country. But I read somewhere, too, “If you are too intelligent to bother with politics, you will be governed by those who aren’t.”

Yes. It makes sense to care. To bother. We have an incredible country. The value of life here is much higher than the majority of the rest of the world. I just don’t like how extremist this country is getting (Not that they weren’t before. Heh) over the simple selection of candidates.

This new healthcare thing won’t send this country under. The war(s)? Possibly. The lack of interest or involvement by more intelligent (?) people such as myself? Perhaps. It makes me grr.

And this entry had nothing to do with what I wanted to write about. Hahaha

Not really.

SO!

While everyone else is posting their New Year’s Resolutions (I never got that tradition/fad, by the way. It’s like a diet of the mind? Why does the new year mean changing something you don’t change normally? If I find something I want to change, I do it. I don’t wait until January… Heh. But to each their own!), I will be posting every writing project I was dedicated to right here. I will give a brief description of what it is, and how far I got before I stopped working on it.

2000: Mindgames. Young adult. A harrowing story about five high school strangers who have to work together to survive the terrors of their worst nightmares. Literally. This was my Eragon-era book. Status: Finished, rough draft. 158 pages.

2001: The Reverberant. High Fantasy. A seven book series of a cast of nearly 80 characters leading up to the fall of a meteor to the planet Lorcalon. Develops the legend of the seven-stoned Reverberant, a mysterious symbol that not even the oldest scholars remember where it came from. Consists of an entire world and fourteen sentient races. Breakdown of individual books:

One the Thistle - Standard format Old Wizard picks up an Apprentice and goes on a Relic Quest. The wizard has alzheimer’s, they pick up some more wanderers on the way due to the destruction of the apprentice’s town, and they are in charge of a five year old child who can read ley lines. They are tracked (and hounded) by an assassin versed in the arts of necromancy. Status: 2/3 finished.
Two the Whistle – Surrounds the exodus of six Slethe, a magical race that undergo a physical change around when they turn sixteen years of age. Armies lay waste to the countryside behind them, and they trek from town to town trying to make it to their Mecca, The Gathering, an island far to the south. Of course, all of them are near sixteen years of age, and one-by-one they change into incredible creatures. Status: Halfway finished.
Three the Candle – Chronicles the sixth voyage of The Blue Life, a nautical ship that converts into a lighthouse when the winter hits the far south. They find ruins in the deep sea that has never been accounted for. Of course, several on board have nefarious plans, and several on board weren’t supposed to come at all… Status: Four chapters finished.
Four the Cradle – Focuses on the warrior caste of Noben, a nomadic dragon-esque race that migrates across the unforgiving wastelands in search of food and shelter. A message was intercepted to find their way to their ancestral homeland; great forces are at work, and the queen is summoned to power. Status: Two chapters finished.
Five the nightsurge – The book on hunting demons. When a badly beaten and abused Slethe slave falls into her sixteen year old change a month ahead of time, the castle she lives in becomes a castle of nightmare. When all of the castle falls into her projected and continual nightmare, its inhabitants begin to die. It’s up to a Troglin demon hunter to enter and end the nightmare, one way or another. Status: Layout only finished.
Six the Sunscourge – The book on a town reviving a dead language. While debating the implifications of speaking/learning a dead language, the Reverberant prophecy is found. A boy dies and the town becomes under seige. The city falls, and the survivors must find a way to take it back. With the help of the dead language as communication, they build an archaic weapon from its words. Status: Layout only finished.
Seven Setter – Bringing the previous six books together, chronicles the crash of the meteor, the great wars, and the appearance of a strange boy with a flying machine strapped to his back who finds out he’s the god of the Reverberant prophecy. Status: First two chapters only.

2003: Inhabitability: Of the Human and Humanity. Science Fiction. Book one of two focuses on a boy on Earth who finds out his planet is about to be destroyed by a civilization of aliens. On the positive side, he is given the opportunity to join the alien race. He’s stuck with a dilemma: die with honor beside all those he has grown to love and cherish, or watch it all burn beside a race of great creatures. He chooses to join the aliens’ side. The more he knows about them, though, the less he feels his decision was the better one. Status: Ten chapters from finished.

2005: Infallibility: Of the Human and the Humane. Science Fiction. Book two delves into the boy’s punishment for returning to Earth to try and save his family. His mind is wiped clean, and he is given a second chance; only he doesn’t know it. Walking around stunned on a commerce ship, he slowly begins to realize the truth. After meeting another human, they mistakenly decide they must find a way to get back to Earth, a planet they don’t know was destroyed. A space chase ensues only for the boy to find his father and learn the truth. They must try and escape the civilization in a seed ship–capable of cultivating life on a new planet–and a prototype space fighter through a black hole. Status: First four chapters, excerpts finished only.

2007: The Acorn King. Fantasy? A novel that surrounds the death of a mother, and the two sons’ reaction to it. One son is a child of war, while the other pursues academia; both are pulled inextricably into a complex web of myth, legend, politics, and intrigue, only to find secrets they couldn’t dream possible. Status: Rough draft and first rewrite/edit finished. 83k.

2008: i, pawn dreamer, stare. Horror. A book that envelopes the underlying connection between seven seemingly unrelated people. Haley thinks she was once a pile of organs, James is running from a past that never leaves, Darion is kidnapped and thrown into sleep deprivation, Melody must leave her bubble of comfort and friends behind, Soren is a drifter with a laptop and incredible insight, Catherine must depend on a seemingly godly person, and Okembe must hold his company and himself together in spite of his obsessive-compulsive needs. And beneath the characters, a dramatic comedy unfolds between chess pieces and two cults that have remained unnamed for a very long time. Status: twenty pages from rough draft finished.

2009: Worldtree. Modern Fantasy. A boy is accepted into one of the seven legendary schools of magic. This book follows his footsteps into the hallowed halls and all the great creations man has made due to the Library of Alexandria not burning. Oh, and the planet is host to eight trees that spread two miles into the sky that have been there since before man existed. Status: Layout, first chapter finished only.

2009: Philosophy of Unlife (working title). Fantasy play. Two brothers find themselves on a deserted island. After spending much time trying to find out how to get back to the mainland, they are given a chance to escape, only to find the mainland has been irreparably changed into a thing of horror. They must change their survival tact in order to escape the seemingly random infestation of undead, and survivors are just as apt to kill them as those who did not. Status: Two chapters and layout finished.

Of course, include with this a staggering list of poetry.

Haven’t written much of anything of late; I’ve been busting tail to get other things done. Most notably, a new job. I need some 74 XL ink cartriges for my printer, and still haven’t found a way to handle it. I dunno what I’m going to do. (Oh. Ebay says I can buy two remanufactured 74XL cartriges at 20 bucks. I might jump on that.)

Dad checked the site out, and when I asked him what he thought of the video blogging, he said, “It looks good. You sound like you’re trying to be academic.” I nodded and said, “Yes. I am. Did you read any of my other entries?” He didn’t. My parents are a  bit out of touch with what I’m doing right now, which is kind of frustrating and a little disheartening. I want them to approve of what I’m doing, and I want to communicate what I’m learning. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way all the time. Some people just don’t understand.

I used to think it was a generational thing… Dad’s father didn’t understand dad, then accordingly, dad doesn’t understand me. But it’s more than that. Why, you might ask? Because I believe it’s a focus thing. Grandfather spent his life farming. That’s what he knows. Farming, and weather, and seasons, and all of that. Dad spent his life working as an engineer. That’s what he knows. Flow charts. Output ratios. Overspilling form data of numbers for each quarter. He used to love science fiction (still dabbles), used to love the technical side of everything. Now, not so much. The movie The Weatherman comes to mind when I write this. Dad likes to camp, but he doesn’t. He likes photography, but he doesn’t. One by one, all those things dropped by the wayside. Why? Stagnation? Depression? A combination thereof?

This confuses me. I am confused. I hope I don’t get to be that way. “The measure of true literacy in the twenty-first century will be the ability to reinvent one’s self.”

The business cards I thought I was spending an arm and a leg on are actually cheaper to buy than the FedEx Kinkos prices. Kinda funny. Now, I’m debating on purchasing letterhead from there.

I hope I get a job soon. I really need the supplemental income.

I’m loving the thought of re-igniting my old writing flame; the Chosen story that is. I believe they’d fit in perfectly with the Worldtree scenario, and it’d be a great introduction to the world at large. How better to pull the reader in than through the eyes of high school kids looking to make a difference in the world? I mean, we were all there at some point or another. Right? Or was it just me?

So… John, Marcus, Delphi, Renie, and Tym will all be joining the cast of Worldtree, and although it’ll take some serious retconning (even if it’s not canon… I have to redo the Mindgames book), I’ll be removing the seemingly omniscient Orbs of the fourth dimension and placing aspects of the school in their place. Ajax will still be present. And the machines will still be present.

I’m kinda excited. At the same time, I really, really don’t have time to be writing on this. Right now or in the near future. I have to get my job off the ground, continue working at Dick’s, take school classes, and pray to God I can get something published. You know. Like a book.

Acorn King OR i, pawn dreamer, stare.

Whatev. Anyway. Off to find family and turkey.

Holiday season is coming soon; I’m not at all excited. Why? Work. Heh. Working retail has been the most rewarding and inventive time of my life so far. It’s been intense and frightening, and I’ve learned a ridiculous amount about how to discuss product with people, and how to discuss people. With people.

It’s been fun. Really. I’m just tired of the below-normal pay for above-normal work, and the special training I’m getting will amount to nothing. I’ll be a Certified Fitness Trainer, and for what? Peanuts, still. I believe I’m worth more than that. So, in keeping with the times, I’m going to step out of being a retail associate.

As soon as I can find another job. Heh.

As far as I can see… More of the same? Hahaha